I ran into The Spoon Theory written by Christine Miserandino and I was amazed to read how well she describes and explains the lack of energy caused by chronic illness, being Lupus the disease that Christine has to live with.There are other chronic diseases that cause similar symptoms, specially if they are the inmunological kind. It is important to know about this theory which can help us and motivate us to save and manage the energy we have during the day, which is in the case of chronic illness limited. This theory measures our amount of energy in spoons, if we can say it that way. We basically get 12 spoons a day.... sometimes less.
It is so real and so difficult for healthy people to understand, my husband who´s lived with me and my thyroid condition for many, many years said a couple of months ago " I just don´t understand you, a few days ago you didn´t even want to eat or prepare supper claiming you were very very sleepy and tonight you don´t even want to go to bed, you´re there obssessed working and writing and doing so many things."
I had to breath in, breath out and say " Don´t forget one of the main symptoms of hypothyroidism is the lack of energy and if the thyroid goes a bit to the hyperthyroid side..... there´s too much energy. That´s why I have to take medication, I´m not a "normal" stable healthy person.....
I gave up ironing for the family a long time ago, I decided to spend my energy on something else and have indeed felt misunderstood. There are other activities I´ve forced myself to do, just to avoid people´s incomprehension and unasked for opinions and comments.
Reading about the spoon theory and identifying with Christine Miserandino has eased the insecurity and guilt I´ve felt for not living up to other people´s standards. I´ve managed to do well but now that I´m going through hormone fluctuations because of menopause I find myself to be extremely sensitive and mellow....maybe I shall say a bit depressive, having a very difficult time to cope with the stress of daily living.... it´s like carrying life on one´s shoulders and gathering all of one´s strength to take the next step.... the image of a weight lifter competing at the olympics comes to mind, such effort. And we do something similar for practically every task of the day, somedays, sometimes. Somedays we just don´t do....we just don´t make the effort.